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If you bother.........................

Søren Kierkegaard

"If One Is Truly to Succeed in Leading a Person to a Specific Place, One Must First and
Foremost Take Care to Find Him Where He Is and Begin There.
This is the secret in the entire art of helping. Anyone who cannot do this is himself
under a delusion if he thinks he is able to help someone else. In order truly to help
someone else, I must understand more than he – but certainly first and foremost
understand what he understands. If I do not do that, then my greater understanding
does not help him at all. If I nevertheless want to assert my greater understanding, then
it is because I am vain or proud, then basically instead of benefiting him I really want to
be admired by him. But all true helping begins with a humbling. The helper must first
humble himself under the person he wants to help and thereby understand that to help is
not to dominate but to serve, that to help is not to be the most dominating but the most
patient, that to help is a willingness for the time being to put up with being in the wrong
and not understanding what the other understands. (…)
If you can do it, if you can very accurately find the place where the other person is and
begin there, then you can perhaps have the good fortune of leading him to the place
where you are.
To be a teacher is not to say: This is the way it is, nor is it to assign lessons and the
like. No, to be a teacher is truly to be the learner. Instruction begins with this, that you,
the teacher, learn from the learner, place yourself in what he has understood and how he
has understood it, if you yourself have not understood it previously, or that you, if you
have understood it, then let him examine you, as it were, so that he can be sure that you
know your lesson. This is the introduction; then the beginning can be made in another
sense." (end of quotation).

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